Monday, May 16, 2011

Denver Conspiracy: A Parade of Poop

Alex Jones has a pivotal movie about the Denver Airport Conspiracy.  And by "pivotal" I mean "misleading and manipulative".  Since Alex is a poop peddler, we are already pretty skeptical about the credibility of this particular conspiracy.  Here is The Skinny on what “they” don’t want you to know, and what I found out about it. 

Proponents of the Denver Airport Conspiracy maintain:  The Denver airport was built even though they didn’t need it and it took up a "peculiar" amount of space.  It has nazi symbols all over and was built to further a secret plot by the New World Order, Illuminati, etc to kill most of the earth’s population using the ominously named “Australia Antigen”.  The artwork in the Denver airport depicts their sinister plans and we should all stockpile guns blah blah blah (you can pretty much guess the rest).


Claim #1 - The Denver airport was built in 1995 against protests and even thought they already had a perfectly good airport (therefore it must have been built for an evil purpose).


Ha!  What Denver had was the run-down Stapleton airport that was nearly 70 years old when the Denver airport opened!  The Stapleton runways were too short for large modern aircraft and too far apart.  Worse yet, there was no room for expansion because the airport was built in the city.  Nearby residents were always complaining about the noise and eventually filed a lawsuit.  So… a new airport was built (duh).  Yeah, the airport had fewer runways, but so what?  The point was that the runways were much longer and closer together.  Thus the new airport could handle any sized airplane in the world and do it in a more efficient manner.  Best of all, it was spaced away from stuff so that noise wouldn’t be an issue.


Claim #2 - The new airport had less runways and absolutely no new technological advancements.


Don’t make me laugh!  Just the redesign of the runway layout was a huge efficiency advancement.  They also added an ingenious automated baggage handling system, and eventually started using solar power.


Claim #3 - The only thing that this airport had that the old one didn't is a "strangely" large amount of "empty" space (Just what a secret organization needs to build a ginormous death ray or whatever).


Oh no!  That is proof of an evil plan!  Oh wait… the problem with the old airport was that they didn’t plan ahead far enough and ran out of space.  OF COURSE the new airport had lots of extra room.  That’s a lot more efficient than building a new airport every time things get crowded.


Claim #4 - When looking at an aerial shot of the new airport, the layout has shocked many. Denver Airport's runways have been situated in such a way that resembles a nazi swastika,


  
My knowledge of the swastika comes from The Sound of Music, but still… this is probably the worst swastika ever.  Admittedly, if you chose certain runways and ignore others altogether then you could get a swastika. But who cares?  Runways are laid out by engineers and other smart people according to prevailing winds and other factors.  If the runways need to be laid out to look like Homer Simpson in order to get the best results then that is what they’ll do.

Claim #5 -  The phrase DZIT DIT GAII appears on the floor, it is German for “black sun” and refers to a swastika.  (That proves a nazi connection!)